A small smile reached the thin features. He had to leave, but that didn't mean he was going to do it willingly. That didn't mean that he had to do it right now. And so, Shinji forced the thoughts away from his mind and returned the squeeze. "Are you hungry?" He asked quietly, loath to interrupt the easing silence, but knowing that his stomach would soon start growling. Amanes’ own stomach grumbled loudly at the mention of food, he blushed and nodded.
"Hai, I guess I am." Shinji smiled.
"I'll fix something." Getting up, he pulled on the pants that his lover had been wearing earlier, not noticing that they rode very low on his jutting hipbones. Amane smiled and stretched when he was left alone on his bed. He watched Shinji walk down the hall, enjoying the view of the pants that were slowly sliding down. He looked back at the ceiling, thinking of something that he had wanted to do for many years, and hoping that Shinji would not object. Amane was adding up the cost of his act, he slowly slid back into a dream state. Not quite sleeping and not quite awake as he could still hear Shinji moving around in his kitchen.
Looking around the kitchen, Shinji decided he would just fix ramen. He could always add vegetables, if Amane had any, or cheese. He smiled a bit to himself, and started to prepare the meal, humming a bit under his breath. After he'd finished boiling the water, he found a bag of varied frozen vegetables and added them to the ramen, waiting for them to soften and heat before turning off the stove, and pouring the meal into a pair of mugs. He placed chopsticks in each mug, and walked back into the bedroom, sitting beside Amane and nudging him lightly. "Hey, wake up Hun."
"Mm...something smells good..." Amane rubbed his eyes and sat up, he moved over so his lover could join him. Taking the mug from Shinji he smelled the ramen, his stomach growled again. Shinji giggled, and carefully chewed his ramen. His eyes twinkled.
"I made ramen... Just added a bit of stuff so it was a little more filling." Amane took up his chopsticks and started eating. It was delicious, who knew such a simple meal could taste so good.
"It's wonderful." He quickly stole a kiss between bites, finishing faster than intended. The warmth that the food made in his stomach was quickly radiating through his body, he smiled contently. Shinji smiled and cocked his head to the side.
"Better?" He asked, lifting the mug from Amanes' hands and bringing it back into the kitchen. Amane returned the smile, he had found himself smiling a lot since he met Shinji. He always felt so happy when he was around the man, even when they would going at it like rabbits, he enjoyed the others presence. He stretched again, debating whether or not to get up or stay in bed until Shinji came back.
Coming back into the room, Shinji sat back on the bed and laid next to him. "Mm. I'm still tired." He smiled a little up at his lover. Amane opened his arms,
"We can sleep more. Whatever you desire shall be yours my love." He kissed Shinji's soft lips, smiling against them. A blush. Shinji had never been spoken to like that, and he was still getting used to it. It felt strange, to be pampered and taken care of, especially when he had always been the one serving others.
"I don't care, really... Whatever works for you." Amane kissed Shinji's blushing cheeks.
"You're not used to being given choices are you? To be in control?" He brushed the mans hair out of his face, studying his features. Shinji shrugged a little, it didn’t really matter, and he said so.
“Unless someone’s hurting me, I don’t care…” He blinked, face screwing up a little. “Besides, when I’m in control of myself, something bad usually happens.” Amane nodded,
"Well, I really care about you Shinji..." He smiled, chuckling at his thoughts, "I want to whisk you away, away from here..." Amane ran his hand through his blonde tresses, why was he saying this. Saying what was in his heart, he has never done so with anyone. Considering he has never really had anyone since his mother committed suicide. He was torn in two. Shinji blinked, and then blinked again. Confused, he tried to think of what to say in response to that. Not that his reply would be negative, but he truly did not know how to react to such a statement. He settled for blinking once more in a comical kind of way.
"And I don't want anything bad to happen to you..." Amane looked up at the frail man to see his series of blinks, making his chuckle. "Gods I don't know why I'm saying this..." He felt stupid, childish. Opening his heart to a man whom he didn't even know felt back, he promised himself a long time ago he would never do this. That worked well. Blinking again, Shinji decided that he didn’t like Amanes’ tone of voice.
“I like hearing you say it… You should keep saying it. It’s… It’s making me feel good, I guess.” Unsure of how to voice himself, he settled for resting his head on Amanes’ shoulder and placing one hand, his fingers curled, over the other mans heart, as though he was trying to grip it through the skin.
Amane settled against the pillows, bringing Shinji with him. He placed his hand over the one framing his heart. He didn't know what to say without making himself sound like a love sick school girl, so he settled for silence; simply enjoying the other's presence.
The thin man frowned a little, but hugged Amane tightly. He didn’t want to upset him, but something had to be said. “I… I don’t have to go back, you know.” Amane froze, his heart skipping a beat.
"Y-you don't?" Shinji swallowed.
“I… I could always work for Zen full time…” He didn’t mention that he was terrified of Hakueis’ reciprocation, that he could lose more than a part of body - If Hakuei was angry enough, he could cause Shinji to lose his mind, like he had Kouji. Amanes’ face brightened.
"Hounto ni?" He looked at his lover, "I-I mean you would do that? I don't want you to get in trouble with that Hakuei guy....Cause you probably still need to go back and get your stuff..." Shinji shrugged lightly, a graceful roll of his bony shoulder.
“I don’t really have anything there. Most of my stuff is in my bag.”
"Okay..." Amane scratched his head, inside he was jumping up and down but on the outside he kept calm, not wanting to seem overly excited. "Welcome home I guess." He smiled at his lover, snuggling up to the frail man.
Shinji smiled, pressing his face into clean hair and sighing. Those words felt good. Forcing thoughts of Hakuei and violence out of his head, he looked up at the ceiling. “So… Where is your flat mate?” He asked, looking at his lover curiously. Amane had almost forgotten about Eishi, and felt bad for it.
"I have no clue, probably out with his koi." He shrugged, he took Shinji's hand in his own and laced their fingers. "I hope you'll be sleeping here anyway, so he can keep the spare room..." He nudged his lover with the comment, happy that the man could stay. A silly grin.
“No, I was going to sleep in the spare room, put Eishi in here, and make you sleep outside.” He kissed the end of his lovers nose. “Dork.” A chuckle left his lips,
"Yeah.. I guess that was a stupid statement..." He scratched his head again, smiling. He didn't know what to do, he was so content right now, he didn't want it to end. Shinji laid back into the pillows. They felt good, and, combined with the knowledge that his lover was beside him, it made a stupid grin come to his face for no reason other than that he was stupidly happy. Looking at Amane, he teasingly ran a finger up his lovers thigh. Amane shivered slightly at the light sensation of his lovers finger. He leaned down and kissed the soft flesh behind the mans ear before sucking on his lightly. He covered Shinji's venturing hand with his own and encouraged him to touch as much as he desired.
Shinji gave an inner laugh - did they ever do anything together besides sex? But it felt good to him, he liked it, being so close, so intimate with someone who cared about him, whom he cared about. He played about the thatch of Amanes’ pubic hair, tugging gently. Amane moaned quietly against Shinji's neck. He laid down and pulled the slightly smaller man on top of him, sliding his hands up his back, kneading the muscles underneath.
A grateful sound came from Shinjis’ throat as he sprawled across his lover, head resting on his chest and his tongue tracing the pale skin. The relief from constant muscle ache was wonderful, and Shinji wound his arms beneath Amanes, bringing them over and around his shoulders in a hug. Amane held Shinji tightly, he closed his eyes and rested his head against the pillows. Everything that had happened in the past 48 hours was running through his head. It had felt so good to find his lover and now even better to have him in his arms. The feeling of arms wrapped around his slender body made Shinji close his eyes, holding in tears of happiness. When had he become so emotional? It was amazing how much a person could change, when they found the right person. He shook his head, laughing a little. Amanes’ eyes opened,
"What's so funny love?" He looked at Shinji, a smile brought to his face at the happiness that covered Shinji's. The smaller man shook his head. “I was just thinking about how I was before I met you. Was it really only a week ago?” He asked, smiling beautifully, a full smile, showing his perfect teeth, a smile he hadn’t used in years. Amane brought a hand to Shinji's cheek and caressed it softly, he lifted his head and kisses his lover briefly.
"You should smile like that more often, it lights up your face beautifully.." Another blush. God, Shinji thought he could be turning into a woman, for all his womanish behavior as of late. “I’ll try to remember that…?” He said, laughing. The sun streaming in the window hit his face and bare back, and the warmth of it made him smile, made him feel good.
"Mmm, so, what did you want to do today?" He rubbed his hands up and down Shinji's back, easing the muscles a bit more. Shinji pouted. “I thought we were just going to laze around all day and have sex? Or did that plan change when I wasn’t paying attention?” Shinji smiled brightly, pecking Amanes cheek. Amane chuckled lightly,
"Laze around and have sex. I love that idea." Amane shifted his head and caught Shinji's lips in a kiss, licking his lower lip. Shinji smiled and backed away playfully, biting his bottom lip as he ran into the hall. “Catch me if you can!”
"Nani??!!" Amane jumped up and ran after him. "You better watch it or those pants will fall off if I don't get them off you first!" Shinji laughed joyfully running into the kitchen and skidding to the other side of the table, facing Amane as he found himself trapped between a wall and the table. Amane smiled at Shinji's predicament, he pushed everything off the table with a single swipe of his arm and climbed on top of it. Reaching the other end in no time he swept his lover in his arms for a passionate kiss.
The thin man jumped at the sound of shattering glass and didn’t resist as he was pulled into the kiss, squeaking briefly in protest, going along with the game that Amane seemed to be playing, himself acting out the innocent being molested by the more experienced. mane pulled Shinji up and sat the man on his lap, forcing his tongue inside the sweet mouth, tasting Shinji once again. The younger man struggled a little, making small, mewling protests in the back of his throat, his hips canting forward and back smoothly, playing the irresistible victim with unsettling ease. Amane laid Shinji down on the table, covering his body with his own. He continued raping his lovers mouth, encouraged by the sounds coming from him. And oh, what sounds they were- small, protesting whimpers of the victim who secretly loves their torture, the quiet whispers of ‘no’ and ‘please’ which really meant ‘yes’ and ‘don’t stop’.
He shifted his lover so that his legs were together, practically ripping the lounge pants off him before taking his respectful place between the other's legs. He stroked up Shinji's thigh, getting closer to his need. Shinji mewled in faux protest, panting breaths escaping his throat.
“N-no…. No, O-sama, please, no…” Came the words, purposely breathy and scared so as to rouse Amane further. And arouse Amane they did, he moaned and rubbed his hips against his victims. Moving to his neck and sucking the supple flesh. Shinji wailed, shining tears filling his eyes although an inner smirk was on his face. The manhandling turned him on fiercely, and he almost hoped that Amane would treat him roughly, hurt him, scar him - as long as he stayed, Shinji didn’t care. Amane slid down to the curve of Shinji's shoulder, delighted in the response he was receiving. He bit into the flesh of his lovers shoulder, instantly bruising. The wail that came from Shinjis’ mouth was long and loud, followed by short gasps of pleasure-pain. “Motto,” He begged, tossing his head. “Motto!”
"Fuck, Shinji.." Amane mumbled against Shinji's skin, he pumped his hips against his lovers even rougher. He bit down on a new part of the mans shoulder, sucking and licking the skin afterwards before looking for more spots to torture. The thin mans’ legs spread wide, making room for Amane between them and he forced up his hips, practically begging to be impaled, praying that Amane wouldn’t tease him and yet, hoping that at the same time, he would. Amane slid his cock between his lovers cheeks, brushing against his puckered entrance with the tip. He nibbled on Shinji's collarbone before suddenly thrusting his hips upward and inside his lover.
Shinji screamed, back arching, body thrashing, although whether it was to get closer or to struggle away, even he himself didn’t know. He just knew he loved it. Amane pulled back out and slammed into his lover again, the table rocking back and forth at his movements. He stayed inside this time, relishing in the feel of Shinjis’ warmth surrounding him. Shinji gasped, high and dry, body clenching and hands attempting to find a hold in the unforgiving wood of the table. “’Mane…” He whispered, licking his lips. Amane rained kisses over Shinji's chest,
"Hmm...?" He could barely think, he started to move his hips slowly, rotating them in circles to see what reaction he would get. The black-maned boys’ head hit the table as he arched his back, moaning loudly from the pit of his stomach. “So good…” He whispered, before taking his bottom lip between his teeth. “Rape me…” Amane was a bit taken back by the request, but liked the thought. He roughly started thrusting into Shinji, scraping his nails down his lovers chest. The red lines immediately raised from Shinjis’ pale skin, burning and he screamed, one hand reaching downwards to take his aching erection into his hand, but first, played with the thatch of hair, tugging and just barely playing the base of his cock. Amane continued to pound into his lover, he took the mans sac into his hand, playing with his balls.
A loud shriek, and semen spattered in pearlescent ribbons to Shinjis’ stomach, his body clenching unbearably tight even to his own mind, his muscles straining in their tensed positions. Amane came not moments after Shinji, the mans contracting muscles around him, milking him of his seed. Shinji's name left his lips as he practically collapsed on top of him.
The whore held him tightly, like a lifeline, and he begged, quietly, childishly, “Don’t leave me… Don’t leave me, please…” Amane rested his head on Shinji's chest, listening to his heart beat frantically.
"I'll never leave you. I'll always be here." Shinji closed his eyes against the tears and whispered,
“Damn you… I was never like this before… Never cried…” Of course, he was talking about the person he had been before meeting Amane - a distant, quiet whore with a taste for pain and an appetite for the bizarre. He couldn’t remember being so emotional over one person since he’d been forced out of his home. And, despite what he said, the words were not meant in anger, but were more a spoken dialogue of Shinjis’ inner confusion. Amane looked up his lover worriedly,
"Is it so bad to cry every once in a while?" He draped his arms lazily over Shinji's rising chest. The other man didn’t say anything, but whimpered and hid his face in Amanes shoulder. He clung to him, wrapped one leg around his waist and his arms around his back and shoulders, and wouldn’t let go. Amane looked around them, remembering that they were in the kitchen. He gathered his frail lover in his arms and carried him to their room. He placed the man on his bed and joined him under the sheets. Shinji sniffled quietly and curled into a fetal position. “Don’t mean to be so dramatic.” A part of the scared, barbed teen he had been shown through as he snarled at himself, the fingernails of his left hand unintentionally scraping bloody furrows in his right shoulder.
Amane quickly became very worried. He grabbed at Shinjis’ hand, desperately trying to stop him from hurting himself. "Shhh, shhh! No, stop. You're not being dramatic. Please, don't hurt yourself." He placed his hand lightly over the cuts on his shoulder, not enough to hurt him, but he tried to stop the bleeding. He could feel the warmth that Shinji's actions created, tears rising in his eyes. "You haven't let anything out in a long time have you, haven't cried." He cooed in the man's ear, trying to calm his lover down.
Shinji buried his face into the sanctuary of Amanes neck and shook his head. The bitter lump in his throat wouldn’t go away, and he couldn’t speak around it. He hated himself for a moment, for being so neurotic, but as hot tears washed down his thin face, he felt better, less mechanical than he had before. A little more like the person he had been five years ago. Amane stroked Shinjis’ hair lovingly. "Cry as much as you need to. Scream. Shout. Anything, just please, don't hurt yourself." He pulled the frail man even closer to himself, trying to provide him the most comfort he could.
But there was no noise. Just the feeling of Shinjis’ tears slipping down the sides of his face to hit the other mans skin, no sobs, sniffles, or uneven breaths to accompany them. He just stared, memorizing the patterns in his lovers skin, and let the pain fall from his eyes, to be forgotten as it disappeared into the soft material of their bed sheets. Amane couldn't do much, only hold his lover. To be there for him when he was needed. He stayed silent, continuing to stroke Shinji's hair. It was something that his mother did after his father had drunkenly beaten him, and it would help. The methodic feeling of his hair being stroked lovingly. He hoped it would help Shinji, even if it was just a little.
“’Mane…” Came his voice, hoarse and dry, nearly three quarters of an hour later. “Are you okay?” Amane stopped moving his hand, he pulled back a little and looked at his sweet lover. A smile coming to his face, he wiped Shinjis’ tears away. "I'm fine, the question is, are YOU okay?" Shinji nodded, pressing a sloppy, childish kiss to the corner of his lovers mouth.
“I’m fine… I promise, I’m okay.” He nuzzled the skin a bit, taking in the scent and taste that belonged only to his lover. “I’m fine.” Amane let out a breath, he was so worried for Shinji. He removed a bloody hand from his shoulder and lifted his lover's chin. Placing a light kiss on his lips,
"Heh, looks like you need another shower Hun. We should wash that blood off." He smiled a little, looking deep into Shinji's eyes and seeing nothing but love. Shinjis’ brown eyes twinkled and he crept out of bed and into the bathroom, slinking into the tub as he let it fill halfway. He had no desire to shower, at the moment, only to sit with his lover and be for a while. Amane followed him to the bathroom. He climbed in after Shinji and snuggled up to him, resting his head on his lover's chest. He listened to his heart beat, he had never been to happy, so content, he didn't know what to do. So he just lay there, kissing the soft skin of Shinji's chest randomly.
Shinji, in an act of almost maternal affection, kissed the top of Amanes’ head and hugged him close. He didn’t think it was fair, that his lover be doing all the comforting. Surely, there was something Amane could talk to him about as well? However, he didn’t want to make assumptions, and decided to leave it for another time, just enjoying the feel of the warm water and his lovers skin. Amane sighed, he felt at home in Shinji's arms, with him. He wanted to spill everything that was going on inside his head, everything that had happened to him and turned him into the man he was today. But he didn't even know where to begin, he didn't want to lay it all on Shinji, he didn't want to ruin their perfect moment. It was a lot to handle, he didn't even know how he did it, let alone having his emotionally frail lover do so. So, he kept his mouth shut, such things could be left for another time, if Shinji asked, he would surly tell. But he himself was not about to bring it up during bath time.
He stayed into the water until he began to shiver, standing and grabbing a warm towel to wrap around himself. “Get out of the water, ne? You’ll freeze to death.” He said with a smile, reaching out a hand towards Amane. Amane gave an embarrassing chuckle, blushing
"Heh, sorry. I guess I was too comfortable." He used the same towel that Shinji did, after he finished drying himself off he pulled the man close to him and inspected his shoulder. "Come 'ere." He walked over to the sink and rummaged through his medicine cabinet. Shinji had enough grace to look bashful. “It’s not bad, ‘Mane, it’ll heal on it’s own…” He protested weakly, unsure of how to argue any point with his lover, much less one that seemed to involve his personal well-being. Amane shook his head, pulling the herbal remedy out and placing some on his finger. He walked back to Shinji and gently rubbed it into his skin.
"Ja, but with this it will heal twice as fast. I promise, this stuff works wonders." The smaller man smiled gently and shrugged one shoulder, leaning back into his lover. “Ne. What do you want to do now?” He asked, a tender smile on his lean features.
"Hmm, I think you know the answer to that question. Whatever my lover feels like doing, I am willing to comply." Amane wrapped his arms around Shinji, pressing their still naked bodies together. This was the longest amount of time he had ever gone without clothes, and the thought brought a smile to his face. Shinji laughed. “You’re something else, Maita Amane.” His smile widened as his lover laughed, it delighted him that he could make someone happy.
"Yeah, I just hope I'm making you happy koi." Shinji smiled sweetly, taking his lovers face into his hands. “You make me so very, very happy, Amane.” He dropped a kiss to his lovers forehead. “Thank you, so much.” Amane blushed at the gesture,
"I love you, Hashiba Shinji." That simple sentence, those stupid words, and Shinji was crying again, this time, he brought his lover back onto the bed with him, tangling their naked limbs together and pressing close to him, almost wanting to rip a hole in his skin so he could crawl in beside his heart and stay there, forever. “I love you more, Maita Amane.” It was whispered against his lovers jaw, and he held him tightly, like a child who has found their lost parent. It was at that point that Amane let tears of his own slip out and mix with Shinjis’.
"Oh Shinji, you make me so very, very happy." He kissed his lover's face all over, holding him tight. A silly smile came onto his face as he laid next to his lover, pressed close, bodies tangled together like wires. It made him glow to hear that, it made him shine like he hadn’t in years.
“I’m glad.” Amane slid one hand to Shinji's back, caressing his muscles. He kissed his cheek and smiled, settling into the pillows. Shinji smirked.
“So we really aren’t going to do anything but sleep and have sex today, are we?” He shivered at the thought and closed his eyes, relaxing a bit.
"Probably not." The smile stayed on his face, he realized that he had been smiling a lot in these past two days. He also realized that he didn't mind. Shinji twisted a bit, trying to get comfortable, and ‘accidentally’ rubbed his thigh against Amanes’ soft member, holding back a childish giggle. Amane looked at his lover, feeling Shinji's 'slip up' he brought their lips together. His hand slid down Shinji's back, coming to the curve of his ass and pushing their lower halves closer together.
"Naughty naughty." The whore bit his lip coyly and smirked.
“Who, me?” He asked, letting his hands wander over his lovers back and shoulders, stroking gently. The older man chucked,
"Hai, you." He pressed Shinji's thigh against himself again, relishing the feeling. Shinji let his body be manipulated, pressing soft kisses to his lovers vulnerable neck, his hands wandering to the brown-sugar nipples, toying with them, using saliva-slicked fingers to bring them to peaks. A moan escaped him while Shinji teased his neck. He continued to rub his awakening member against Shinji's thigh, snaking a hand between them and taking his lover, stroking him slowly. A moan escaped Amane as Shinji teased his neck. He continued to rub his awakening member against Shinji's thigh, snaking a hand between them and taking his lover, stroking him slowly. The slow closing of Shinjis’ eyes was almost instinctual, as was the quick rollover onto his side, waiting to be physically instructed into his next position out of pure habit. Amane shifted so that he partially lay over Shinji, still stroking him.
"Shin, please don't wait to be told what to do. Do what ever your want. I want you to be my lover, not my whore." Shinji turned large brown eyes to his lover - not client, lover - and blinked slowly.
“I… I don’t know…” What to do. Without being told what to do, Shinji was nearly unable to do anything. On the inside, he knew there was something wrong with that, but having acted that way for the past five years of his life, he was completely unsure as to what to do. So he tentatively rolled onto his back, pulling Amane down to him, licking at his lips.
"Do whatever feels good. Experiment." Amane followed Shinji as he was pulled on top of him, he didn't want to push his lover too far. But he wanted to try and get him out of the state of mind that he was a whore and that he was his client. It wasn't that way anymore. Shinji rewarded Amanes’ patience by pulling him closer, demanding a bit more of the kisses he was receiving, one hand moving to stroke his lovers back and thighs. He smirked inwardly, glad for his long arms. Amane took Shinji's un-occupied hand and laced their fingers together. He kissed back gladly, opening his mouth to let the other inside. Shinji licked nervously at his companions mouth, taking his bottom lip between his teeth and biting gently, chewing and sucking in apology. Amane trusted his lover, and would let him do anything he wanted to him. He let the man suckle in his lip, licking Shinji's upper lip lightly. Shinji nursed the bruised lip for a moment, before pushing Amane off of him, crawling over his body and covering it with his own, his knees on either side of his lovers’ hips, his arms under and around his shoulders. Amane was a bit surprised as he was shoved off, he stifled a yelp. He surprise quickly fading as he was covered with Shinji's body. The thinner man just laid atop his lover, whispering into his ear,
“I don’t know what to do, from here.” His blush tinted his cheeks and ears, and he laid his head down on his lovers shoulder. Amane placed his hand on the back of Shinji's neck.
"Hm, let's see then. What do I do to you that you like? Tell me." Shinji blushed even more.
“Eto..” He started, thinking for a moment. “I like everything you do to me…” A sheepish smile, eyebrows raised in faint apology.
"Well, everything I do to you. Do to me." Amane smiled sweetly, "It's a start ne?" Shinji licked his lips and sat back, letting his fingers wander over his lovers torso, gently scratching with his nails and following his fingers with his tongue. He figured, it was better than nothing. Amane smiled as Shinji sat up, he arched his back against the touch, suddenly wanting more. Shinji, taking the response as nothing short of positive, leaned down a bit further and bit gently at the clean torso in front of him, suddenly wanting to see it marked, just a little bit. To show the world that as much as Amane owned him, he was owned in return. Amane stretched his body out completely, giving Shinji full access to him.
His shy mouth worked its’ way down, licking at his lovers nipples, biting them gently, and scraping his teeth down the hollows of his lovers hips, knowing that it felt stupidly erotic. Amane mewled a little, "You can bite me, hurt me, possess me." He arched his back again, encouraging Shinji to do as he pleased. The redhead looked up at his lover in something akin to shock, while at the same time, he wasn’t at all surprised to hear something like that from Amanes’ mouth at all. Swallowing hard, he smiled weakly. “I can try.” Amane blushed at his confession and the reaction that it received,
"Sorry if that seemed sudden. I just don't want you to be shy." Shinji smiled.
“I know… I just think, it’s wrong to completely possess someone… To make them need you, until they can’t live without you. That’s not fair.” He swallowed again. “But I think… I wouldn’t mind just… Keeping you to myself.” Another childishly joyful smile. Amane nodded, he understood completely,
"That won't happen. I promise." He smiled as Shinji did, it was almost impossible not to. "I am yours and you are mine. But you are still yours and I am still mine, okay?" He pulled his lover up and gently kissed his soft lips. Shinji smiled into the kiss and, feeling a bit more confident, let his hands wander to his lovers legs as he moved off of them, kneeling between them and breathing warm, damp air over the head of his lovers cock. Amane leaned his head back and closed his eyes, he pulled in a breath when he felt warm air brush over his cock. Shinji smiled and leaned down, taking in his lovers member with practiced ease, loving the pressure on his throat, loving the way it felt sliding back and forth. Amane moaned lightly, the warm wet mouth surrounding him felt so good. He tried to keep his hips flush to the sheets, letting Shinji suck him off.
The thin man smirked inwardly and let one hand wander up to his lovers mouth, pushing his lips apart and playing with his tongue. Amane gladly took Shinji's fingers into his mouth, running his tongue in between the slender digits and sucking lightly. Then they were pulled away, and Shinji let them slide down between his lovers legs, more nervous now than he could ever remember being. He let them rest against the puckered entrance there, rubbing, massaging, scared to death.
Amane mewled slightly when he felt wet fingers rubbing his most secret of places. He spread his legs wider, allowing Shinji to move in if he pleased. He would understand if he didn't, Shinji could stop at any point, he didn't want to push his lover into doing something he didn't want to. Shinji took a deep mental breath, berating himself and let one fingertip squirm into his lovers body, as gently as he could. Amane stopped squirming and laid still. The invasion a sweet one that he hadn't felt in quite some time, it didn't hurt yet and would though if more were pushed inside him. He took his own fingers into his mouth, distracting himself from making little noises. "Shinji..." His lovers name fell from his lips before he had the chance to catch it.
The thin man pulled off his lovers erection and re-positioned them, so that Amanes’ back was resting against his thighs, and his mouth was flush with his lovers entrance and balls. He took first one, and then the other, into his mouth, sucking lightly as his fingertip moved slowly and gently, not pushing further, rather toying with what it could already reach.
"Ahh..." This was a new sensation for Amane, one had never felt before. He wanted to push his hips down, to impale himself further onto the finger teasing him. Shinji let his tongue work its’ way to his lovers entrance, licking at his finger and his lovers body, trying to make the invasion just a bit easier. Amane changed his mind and lifted his groin upwards, allowing more move for Shinji to maneuver. His head rolled to the side, eyes half open, moaning his desire. A shy smile was given in return, and Shinji continued to ease his finger inside, finally getting it in to the first knuckle, pulling it out, and then pushing back in slowly. Amanes’ eyes shut completely, "Shinji....please....." It was quite a turn of events, him begging. But he enjoyed it, he liked being uke as much as he did seme. He rocked his hips, straining for more contact.
And Shinji acquiesced, easing in a second slick finger, trying to be gentle as his mouth played over the soft sac and entrance, trying to relax his lover as much as possible, hoping that he would be able to do what he wanted to. Amane moaned again, he could feel a minute amount of pain. But not enough to over power the pleasure that was already racing through his body. Shinji kept at what he was doing, letting his free hand stroke his lover as he turned his fingers, scissoring and stretching as carefully as he could. He could feel the pain more now as he was stretched, "Shinji...I need..." Being pleasured from both ends was almost too much, he begged Shinji to either be inside him or let him inside. The scarecrow licked his lips nervously.
“What do you need?” He asked, honestly unsure as to what to do, as his lips played about the skin of his lovers’ erection.
"Hmm...I need you...In me....Please." He rocked his hips, aching more attention for his cock. Shinji froze for just a split second, before nodding, dropping a wet kiss to the head of his lovers erection and re-positioning him so that he was sitting on his lap. He looked at Amane with brown eyes like a child’s.
“I’m. I guess.” He couldn’t spit out what he was trying to say, and settled for setting Amane just above his own aching erection, blushing violently.
"What, you what..?" Amane looked at Shinji, wanting to know what his lover was going to say. Shinji blushed deeper.
“I don’t know what to do… How to make it, not hurt.” He buried his face in his lovers chest, hair hanging in his eyes. Amane kissed Shinji's blushing cheeks,
"Don't worry. It will always hurt, no matter what. But I do have a bottle of lube in the drawer if you want to use it." A nod and Shinji reached for the drawer, pulling out the container and putting a bit into his hand, reaching underneath his lover and smiling a bit in relief as his fingers slipped in more easily, the third giving almost no resistance at all. Amane moaned again as he was probed by the digits, he may have wanted Shinji to be inside him but he decided to wait until his lover was ready. He brought a hand down and caressed the mans cheek, pulling him up for another kiss, grateful for his long arms.
It wasn’t long, before Shinjis’ confidence went up a bit, and he quickly lubricated himself, looking up at Amane and licking his lips, cocking his head to the side in the silent question, ‘Are you ready?’ Amane nodded silently, inwardly bracing himself. Shinji took a deep breath and took a firm grip on his lovers hips, carefully pulling him downward, swallowing as he pushed against the opening, just the barest bit, still scared, feeling foolish.
"It's okay." He placed his hand on Shinji's arm as they gripped his slender hips. Another deep breath, and Shinji pushed his lover down as slowly and carefully as he could, bringing up his knees to support his back as he felt the head of his cock disappear into Amanes’ warm, willing body. Amane moaned slightly as he felt Shinji's head slip inside him. He resisted the urge to push his hips down further and completely take in his lovers cock. Shinji lowered his lover at a pace he could handle, and, when he was completely inside, he let out a breath, leaning his head against his lovers shoulder, breathing heavily. Amane wrapped his arms around Shinji's neck, lifting his head for a kiss.
"Not so bad right?" He very slowly moved his hips, very slowly. Shinji smiled weakly and shook his head, afraid to move, lest he embarrass himself. Instead, he let one hand wrap around his lovers erection, holding it tightly as his other hand reached to scratch gently at the hollows of his hips and his mouth kissed at the sensitive neck, doing what he knew his lover appreciated. Amane moved his head to the side, allowing Shinji more room. He slid his hands down to the curve of his lovers ass, he pushed them forward to meet his own.
“Ahn…” Shinji licked his lips and took a risk, pushing his hips up and then pulling them down, repeating the action a few times to gauge the reaction. Amanes’ eyes went wide at the movements, moaning shamelessly. He pushed his hips down to meet Shinji's, wrapping his hand around his lovers and pumping himself. Shinji bit his bottom lip tightly, continuing to gently let his hips move, his legs tense and aching, but that just made the sensation that much more acute.
"Mm...Shinji...harder...faster..." Amane kept his hand over his lovers, moving it in time with the thrusts that rocked his body. Unable to not do what his lover wanted him to, Shinji snapped his hips up, surprised at the force. He did it again, watching his cock disappear back into Amanes body with a twisted kind of fascination. Amane moaned, pulling his lovers gaze from their connection and towards him, he pulled him down for a rough kiss. He broke away as Shinji struck the spot deep inside him, his lovers name ripping from his throat.
The sudden clench of surprise made Shinji yelp, his hips jumping of their own accord as he felt his body tighten in response.
“’Mane…” He whispered, moving to let his lips rest just above his companions cock. “Fuck my mouth.” He knew he could do this, had done it before with his next-door neighbor at work, but had never admitted it to Amane - it had been the only other time he was on top, and he hadn’t thought much about it until just then. A new feeling entered Amanes brain as he heard his lover's velvet voice. He looked down and saw Shinji contorted in a way he had never seen before.
"Wha-alright." He didn't want to complain lest the man stop. He placed his hands on the back of Shinji's head and pushed his hips upward, his cock entering his mouth. Moaning in contentment, Shinji snapped his hips up, his lovers member sliding further in, then out as he lowered his hips, and he pushed them up again, mewling deep in his throat. Amanes’ mouth went wide at the new sensation. It was nothing compared to what he had felt before, being fucked and sucked by the same man. He couldn't help but give a little scream of pleasure, he was surely going to come soon. An inner smile, and Shinji pushed his hips up again, a bit harder than necessary, letting one hand wander to his lovers soft balls, rolling them in one long hand as he hummed. "Shinji... I'm going to... Ahh!" He felt his hips buck up, totally out of control of the situation, he was at Shinji's mercy. He could feel himself coming very close to the edge, he could almost feel the semen rushing through him and into Shinji's mouth. "Shinji!" Shinji tore his mouth away, the warm ribbons landing on his lips and cheek, as his own orgasm ran rampant through his body, his head cracking back against the headboard, a soft whine in his throat.
Amanes’ body went limp as he was spent, curling his arms around his love. Shinji held him, dazedly reaching for the loose blankets and pulling one up and around their bodies, the sweet sweat smell misting between their bodies in a post-coital glow. “Love you.” He whispered quietly, unwilling to let go of his lover to even turn them onto their sides.
"I love you too. And where the hell did you learn to do that..." Amane tried to catch his breath, worn out from the most amazing sex he had ever experienced. Shinji giggled a little bit, kissing his lovers cheek.
“Well, I learned that by accident, actually. My neighbor… Someone wanted a show, you know, he was a voyeur, so Ken and I had sex… It was the only other time I’ve been on top.” A worried expression came to his face as he thought, Hope Ken is okay… Amane nodded, noting the look on Shinji's face,
"What's wrong?" He pulled him even tighter against his own body, not wanting to let him go. Shinji shrugged a bit.
“Just worried about Ken. I’ll see him soon, though, he’s usually out on Tuesdays, so he’ll be wandering. I’ll find him later.” He smiled, kissing the tip of Amanes nose. “I think it’s time for a nap now, though.”
"Okay. Hai, I think so too. I have work tomorrow." Amane snuggled down into the blankets, feeding off the warmth his lover provided. "I love you." Shinji glowed a little, those words felt so good.
“Love you too.” He kissed Amanes’ forehead, and let himself drift, knowing that he would fall asleep soon. Amane watched his sweet Shinji slowly fall asleep, following soon after.