Hanari Sae (_fl0werp0wer) wrote in ishindenshin,
Hanari Sae

[ This was meant to be posted after Valentine's day but my muses ran away and just recently came back. Written as a journal entry because.. Sae felt like it xP ]

Mon ami..

Here I sit accompanied by a glass of red wine after having a romantic dinner with myself, yes, it is Valentine's day again. Once again that time of the year has come and just like in the last few years I stand alone still.

It's a wonderful day for bussines, I can't deny that. Roses sold very well, specially those rarer specimens I ordered during auttum; they blossomed quite beautifully, but I wouldn't have been able to get them to survive past the winter snow without Naoki's help. Ah, Naoki. I can't help but to smile when I think of him, he's so young still and even a bit naive. That man he likes is definetely not someone I would trust. But all I can do is hope that it all goes well for them.

At least they've got each other.

Today I opened the shop up early, knowing that there are always plenty of lovelies that are desperate to get a last minute detail for an early morning surprise. As expected, I had at least seven customers before ten in the morning; the number kept rising as the day progressed and I barely had time to eat a proper meal.

Watching all those people put their faith into a simple flower in hopes that it'll convey the feeling they are trying to express is heart-touching. Hm.. Had I received a flower that day, even from a total stranger or an anonymous sender, it would have made me very happy. But there were no flowers for me. Which I find rather ironic.

Where the heck is Mister Right?

I've been wondering that for a while now. Flings aren't really my thing, I've tried them to no avail. I've searched everywhere and in all social circles and classes, from the dandies to the ravers, bohemian artists to macho men. But I just can't find the one just for me. Does he really exist even?

Why can't it be like in those romantic 50s detectives' movies?

All so wonderful and musical, everything coordinated and beautiful. The heroic detective always there at the right time to help the lady in distress.
I don't dream of knights in shining armors but of handsome detectives that come to my aid. Maybe people just think I'm odd, but it's not like I care, I'm happy being the way I am.

I just need a man to love me now.

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